Blank Pages

If you know me well, you know that I journal almost every day.  I buy a blank journal every year.  

The blank pages left are few.  Another year is winding down.

Another year of being single.

Another year of writing (or not writing)

Another year of financial sameness and struggles

A year of loss - 2 very special people in my life went to be with the Lord.

A year of realizing who your friends truly are (or aren't)

A year of realizing how very important family is.

A year of helping others and thinking less of myself

Its also a year of growing spiritually, of growing closer to people, of learning more about ME.

It was a year of trusting God in my struggles and seeing Him remain faithful to me.

It was a year of Him sustaining me.

His grace is a sustaining grace.  His grace is enough.  Jesus is enough.  

He gives me just enough grace to get through each moment.  It sustains me.  It meets me where I'm at.  

I ask myself "What about next year?  What am I willing to do for God next year?  Where am I willing to go?"  

What has this year been like for you?  Journaling is a way for me to document what happened in my year so I can go back and see how God showed up.  Its humbling and its raw.  I write what I am experiencing - good or bad.  Someday when I'm gone my kids will find my journals and there will be things in there that may shock them.  They will see what I kept hidden from them.  They will know I was more than just mom.  I felt - I experienced hurt, anger, resentment, disappointment, struggles and pain but I also found Joy and peace and my faith grew thru all of that.  Each year tells a different story and at the end of each year I look forward to the blank pages in front of me.  I love January 1!  Not only is it my birthday but its also the day I get to write on that first blank page.  I know I need to work harder at changing my story.  I need to do more and each year on day 1 there is always hope and excitement to put behind what was wrong and press forward to a clean slate...
 

....I'm excited to see what the next blank page holds for me